Wednesday, 2 October 2013

5 MISTAKES YOU MUST AVOID ON A FIRST DATE

Patti Stanger is the host of Bravo’s “Millionaire Matchmaker” and a self-proclaimed love and marriage guru who founded her own matchmaking service, the Millionaire’s Club.

Stanger, 51, recently found love herself,  she said, by following her own advice laid out in her book,  ‘Become Your Own Matchmaker.”

“One of the steps [in the book] was to date online,” Stanger said today on “Good Morning America,” alongside boyfriend David Krausse.

“I’m friends with Jenny McCarthy and Ricki Lake, and they had both done this, and they said, ‘Listen, I didn’t meet the one but I had a great time,’” she said.  “And I’m like, ‘You know, you get older in life and you’re like, where do I meet people anymore? Everybody has hooked up.’”

Stanger discovered, unintentionally, that going online to find love allowed the well-known reality TV star some temporary  anonymity.

“On our second date we went to the Getty Museum in Los Angeles, and we were having a great time and soon these people started asking to take pictures with her,” Krausse said.  “I thought, ‘What is going on here? That’s the oddest thing.’  And that night I raced home and Googled [her].”

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” he said of his reaction to finding out on Google that his girlfriend was famous.  “I felt like such a moron for not knowing who she was.”

The two stayed together, and Stanger is now wearing  a “promise ring” on her ring finger, although it is not yet an engagement ring, she confirmed on “GMA.”

Looking for love yourself?  Here are Stanger’s five tips for ensuring you make a good first impression on the all-important first date.

Tip No. 1:  Avoid Negativity

You think you know it all and you believe that the universe holds nothing new. You are sour and jaded on everything,
you think you’ve seen it all and met every type of person there is to meet.  So then no one walking through the door would surprise you.  A negative attitude leaves no wiggle room for the magic to happen.  Be positive on the first date! Who knows what awaits you.

Tip No. 2:  Avoid Talking About the Exes

There is not any time on a first date when you should be talking about your exes.  Particularly if you lead with someone famous or rich who used to be your partner – it makes the other person feel not at all special. And women in particular should never talk about their exes at the start of a relationship;  men don’t want to believe the woman has been playing the field, that she’s used goods.  The past will come up eventually, but talking about exes right at the beginning will turn a smart man off.

Tip No. 3:  Avoid Talking About Money

If you talk about money you are either going to be bragging or complaining: “I’ve got five cars and two jets” or “They want to charge us how much for the steak?”  Either way it’s an uncomfortable subject, and you won’t look good overstating your wealth or being ill-tempered that you’re about to go broke.   Just don’t bring up money at all.

Tip No. 4:  Avoid Getting Drunk

Be committed to the two-drink maximum rule.  Stick to it. If you get drunk, you will likely get overtly sexual and you won’t be able to gauge whether you are being flirty or embarrassingly  sexual.  If your goal is a serious relationship –  or even a second date — you won’t get either if you are sloppy at the table.  This holds particularly for women; men who are worthy of a good relationship don’t want a first date with someone who is so sexual that it leaves nothing to the imagination.  The loss of every perception often happens when you get drunk,  so on the first date watch your liquor.

Tip  No. 5:  Avoid Talking About Controversial Subjects

There is no reason at all to talk about politics or religion on the first date.  These are provocative topics that can lead to
heated debates and ruin the date.  If you delve into serious subjects it will become too serious in tone and take away the lightheartedness of the date.  That’s not to say you can’t talk about current events – do your homework  and be a good conversationalist.  Even better, stay on topics that make you happy.  If you like skiing or hiking, talk excitedly about it.  You want to feel young at heart on your first date, and so does the person you are with.
By ABC News

 
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